There are a lot of very common misconceptions about going to therapy that keep people from seeking out the help they want or need. Many of these myths point to pervasive socio-cultural stigmas about needing help, mental illness, and the role of the therapist in our lives.

From popular media depictions of therapists (looking at you, Dr. Phil) to strong beliefs about mental illnesses, many of the myths that lots of us opt into aren’t quite as accurate as we think. And many of them are just plain wrong.

Let’s take a look at some of the most common myths that get in the way of folks getting the very helpful and life enhancing support they deserve:

THERAPY IS FOR “CRAZY” PEOPLE

First, let’s address this word, “crazy.” It isn’t helpful! While some people do indeed experience the world from a lens of diagnosable mental illnesses, the belief that these folks are simply “crazy” is harmful and inaccurate. In order to break down the very powerful social stigma around mental illness, the language we use is really important. There isn’t anything wrong with having been diagnosed with a mental illness. It is not a character assessment, but rather, a way to sum up a specific set of symptoms that impact someone’s life. 

It is true that people who have been diagnosed with mental illnesses utilize therapy as a form of treatment and symptom management. But therapy is also for everyone who identifies parts of themselves or their lives that feel sticky, challenging, or needing to be changed somehow. Every therapist approaches this differently, so don’t be afraid to ask questions. 

THERAPY LASTS FOREVER

Nope! I mean, it totally can, and some folks find regular visits to their therapist to be part of their total approach to wellness. However, if you’re seeking therapy to change or process something, lots of different approaches to therapy have different time frames. It lasts as long as you need it to.

For some therapeutic approaches, the timeline can be quite short! For example, Solution Focused Therapy is designed to be brief and straight to the point. Other approaches have different methods and lengths of time. It all really depends on you, your therapist, and the reasons you’re seeking out the help of a therapist.

THERAPISTS WILL SHAME AND CONFRONT YOU

If they do, leave. Ask for referrals and find a new therapist. Every legitimate therapist is under a legal and ethical obligation to serve your best interests, not their own. Trust your instincts on this, too. If that therapist doesn’t feel like a person who can hold safe space for you, you get to find someone who can.

Your therapist might offer challenges to patterns of thought or behavior, but that should never reach the level of shaming or making you feel inferior. 

THERAPY IS ONLY FOCUSING ON THE POSITIVE

Well, yes and no. It is true that many therapists operate from strengths-based perspectives. What that often means is that your therapist is helping you to identify all of the stuff you do really well so that you can learn to navigate the world with your strengths, rather than from a place of shame or fear.

What that doesn’t mean is that every conversation needs to be about finding the silver lining. The most skilled therapists will meet you where you are and make space for every aspect of your experience; the good, the bad, the hard, and the ugly. There are lots of different ways therapists do this! More on that in a future installment of Therapy 101. 

THERAPY TURNS YOU INTO SOMEONE ELSE

In many ways, a goal of therapy can be to find you in a world that is constantly pulling us in so many directions. A world that is demanding our attention far, far away from ourselves and our needs. Therapy can be a place where you find yourself. A place where you can learn about your needs and learn how to communicate your needs.

If anything, therapy is there to help you become even more you. 

GOING TO THERAPY IS A SIGN OF WEAKNESS

Some of the work that is done in the therapy room asks us to find our remarkable strengths. Therapy can be good, hard work. You will be confronting old and unhelpful patterns, working through traumas, and learning how to communicate in relationships with others. And, sometimes, really tough stuff comes up, like learning ways to forgive and trust a partner after infidelity.

Many of us have been taught to believe that talking about our feelings (or even having them at all) is a sign of weakness. But, digging down deep into vulnerable spaces takes courage. Being radically honest and appreciative of ourselves and our stories is an incredible example of strength. 

THERAPY 101 MYTH-BUSTING: THE TAKEAWAY

These are only a small selection of the plethora of unhelpful beliefs many of us share about therapy. In some ways, these beliefs touch on how we feel about being helped. Lots of us aren’t taught how to ask for help, or identify when we might need it. It’s okay to not be okay, and it’s okay to need help. Yes, it’s okay to want to change something in your life and not know-how. We are human in all of the ways that humanness can be. 

As always, the incredible therapists at Relationship Insights are here for you. Maybe you’ve never been to therapy before, or have previously had bad experiences with therapists. Perhaps you are an old seasoned pro, or somewhere in between. No matter where you are on the spectrum, we have space, time, and a lot of great stuff to share with you!

Relationship Insights Therapy & Coaching offers relationship therapy in Minneapolis, MN. Whether it’s through individual therapy or couples therapy, Relationship Insights is here to help you improve your relationships. We love doing the deep work that actually makes a difference. If you are up for some powerful insights, deep reflection and some awesome tools then contact us to set up a session today.

The post Therapy 101: Myth Busting appeared first on Relationship Insights.

If you’ve never been to therapy before, or have had particularly crappy experiences with choosing a therapist, the process can feel ridiculously daunting. Not only are you perhaps trying to navigate through the stigma of seeking out therapy in the first place, but also there are a lot of terms and things to know that we often don’t talk about. 

Therapy 101 will be your comprehensive guide to all things therapy!

First thing’s first …

CHOOSING A THERAPIST THAT IS THE RIGHT FIT FOR YOU

Keep in mind that therapists are humans! And just like any random human you might interact with, not every therapist’s style or personality are the right fit for everyone. It can feel pretty overwhelming to dive headfirst into a search for a professional when you aren’t quite sure what you’re doing. Fear not, your handy dandy therapist-next-door is here to help!

MONEY, HONEY

We’re gonna get this one upfront and center because it’s a huge part of the consideration! It’s also a sticky spot for lots of us. Particularly right now, having conversations about finances can feel, well, yucky. It’s also part of the exchange. What’s your budget?! How much money can you realistically utilize to pay for therapy? There is a really big range of price points for seeking out services.

For interns and newly graduated professionals, you can expect to pay a lower rate than for fully licensed and very experienced clinicians. Many skilled therapists choose not to work with health insurance companies due to paperwork and low reimbursements. That being said, if an out of pocket expense of $60-$150 per session isn’t in your budget, your health insurance company will have a list of folks who operate within your insurance network. There may also be sliding scale fees or other options available for any therapist you find! It never hurts to send them a quick email and ask. Check out our rates to get a sense of what it might look like.

SHOP AROUND

Looking at profiles of therapists can feel an awful like dating. Remember something: you are paying for a professional service. You can expect to be treated with dignity, respect, and having your boundaries honored always. This isn’t a decision you have to take lightly. You get to ask lots of questions! Many therapists offer free or low-cost consultations that are built for this very thing.

If something is pertinent to your life, it’s fair to ask someone how they work with that. What kind of training does this particular person have? Does their profile say something that feels good to you? Anything in particular that you are curious about? Therapy is for and about you. What do you feel like you need? Reach out to lots of folks! Set up consultations or intake sessions with a few different therapists. Try them all on for size and see who you feel the most comfortable with. 

CONSIDER SPECIALTIES

At the bottom of every profile for every therapist ever, there is probably a relatively long list of specialties and special interests that the therapist has. Check those out! If you’re looking for an LGBTQ+ identified or allied therapist, that therapist will have made it very clear that they are who you’re looking for. Same goes for BIPOC therapists and those who are culturally competent in ways that are relevant to your life. What specialties or special interests does a particular therapist have that stand out to you? This is a great way to begin to make sure that someone is more likely going to be a good fit for you.

Additionally, you might see words like Narrative Therapy, Existential Therapy, CBT, DBT, Gestalt Psychology, or, like, honestly a thousand others. This usually identifies a therapist’s preferred theoretical orientation. Each of these brands of therapy have different ways of thinking and different ways to treat similar issues or problems. If you want to know more about what a particular therapeutic orientation means, don’t be afraid to ask! And stay tuned for a closer look at some of these in future installments of Therapy 101!

WHAT DO THERAPIST TITLES MEAN?

It may feel strange to some to see the title Marriage and Family Therapist when they’re seeking therapy as an individual. Fear not! Marriage and Family Therapists (LMFT, LAMFT), Clinical Social Workers (LICSW), Licensed Professional Clinical Counselors (LPCC, LPCA), and others often function mostly similarly. There may be some slight variations in how different folks approach therapy, so if you don’t know, ask them! 

TRUST YOUR INSTINCTS

You know yourself better than anyone else. Trust your instincts to read the situation and person accurately. If you feel like the person won’t serve your needs in the way you’d like, you can communicate that! Every really great therapist will want what’s best for you. Even if that means helping you find someone that fits you and your needs even better. Asking for referrals and recommendations based on your unique needs and personal preferences is A-OK! Most every therapist has a bunch of fellow therapist pals who they often refer to. 

CHOOSING A THERAPIST: THE TAKEAWAY

Choosing the right therapist for you, as daunting as it can totally feel, is really the first most important step to building the life you really want. Making sure that you’re working with someone who allows you to feel supported, cared for, and encouraged by can make a huge difference in the outcome of therapy. Allow yourself the space to be curious, discerning, and open to all sorts of possibilities! There are so many different ways to be a human and there are lots of different ways to do therapy. Finding just the right mix will really help the process from start to end.

RESOURCES

You can find profiles for therapists in your area on

• Psychology Today
• Therapy Den
• Good Therapy

And a good old fashioned google search! Tip: be specific in your google search. Use terms that are relevant to you. For example, couples therapy Minneapolis or Twin Cities trauma therapist.

And you can always check out the wonderful therapists at Relationship Insights! Be sure to reach out if you have any questions or if there is anything that we can do to support you!

Relationship Insights Therapy & Coaching offers relationship therapy in Minneapolis, MN. Whether it’s through individual therapy or couples therapy, Relationship Insights is here to help you improve your relationships. We love doing the deep work that actually makes a difference. If you are up for some powerful insights, deep reflection and some awesome tools then contact us to set up a session today.

The post Therapy 101: Choosing A Therapist appeared first on Relationship Insights.